July 2006 Archives

Was drinking espresso at 1842 this morning. They've got some new cups to replace all the chipped, cracked ones they had before. I didn't hear the story on this, but all the other ones were damaged, either smashed by clumsy customers, or broken in the dishwasher. For a good three weeks, they served espresso these tiny paper cups. I kept wanting to ask for a wee lid to put on the cups.

Finished up Arthur C. Clarke's Childhood's End, and am back on the Carl Hiaasen wagon with Basket Case. So far, so good -- a nice light break from Clarke's book. It seems my reading patterns are starting to look like monthly biorhythms charts (and all the hoo-hah they represent). Over the past couple of months, I've been reading Carl Hiaasen, Arthur C. Clarke, Christopher Moore, John Wyndham, Carl Hiaasen, Anne Rice, John Wyndham, Eric Garcia, Anne Rice, Eric Garcia, Matt Ruff, H.G. Wells, Douglas Coupland, Matt Ruff ... wow. I figured I'd read a few more quirky, humourous, genre-defying novels, and then dig into some heavy science fiction. Maybe some Tom Robbins, and then Ayn Rand.

Actually, many of the non-science-fiction novels are from R's discard shelf. She burns through light fiction like a hot knife through something soft and oily. I figured it was time to dig into the pile before it went back to the library.

I hate all this coffee lingo. All this doppio, no-fat, decaf, long pull, half foam, skim milk shit. Usually I'll ask for a medium black coffee -- but of course you can't do that at Starbucks. It has to be a grande Sumatra or whatever the café du jour is. I order the regular coffees because a) they're cheaper than the $3.50 lattes/cappuccinos from the big machine; b) they're delivered quickly, so you don't have to wait; and c) no one orders them, so there's usually a lot left and you don't have to stand in line, like a chump. In a pinch I'll ask for an Americano, since it's about as close as you can get to a normal coffee when they -- get this -- run out of it.

I once stood in front of the counter at a Starbucks and the guy said, "Sorry, but we don't have any more of the [insert disenfranchised 3rd nation region] coffee left." None of the three servers behind the counter were making moves to make another pot, nor were they rushing to find a dark roast replacement for the expired [insert disenfranchised 3rd nation region] blend. But I digress ....

So, last month when I showed up with my lines memorized, quickly scanning the daily coffee menu (that sounds ridiculous because it is) for the desired dark roast name, I ordered a grande Sumatra. The guy looked at me, smiled, and said, "Room?" I stared at him blankly, wondering what he meant by this. Was he asking me to get a room? Was there room enough in my belly for a grande Sumatra? Might I not want the tall (small) instead? Was I wearing a nametag that said "Room" on it? Was that how much it cost?

No. "Room" is apparently Starbucks cant for "Do you want room for cream in your cup?" I suppose it was too difficult for him to say, "Want room for cream?" I kind of laughed at him. Not kind of ... I really laughed at him -- a big belly laugh. I then wiped a tear from my eye, made some snide comment about the Starbucks jargon, and took my coffee. I walked away, leaving him with an embarrased look. In retrospect, this was probably mean. Though, in retrospect, I'd probably do it again.

Today I went in and ordered my grande Sumatra. The server (a different person) asked "Want room for cream?" I smiled and politely declined.

We were talking about Chinese food the other day -- you know, what kinds were traditional to which region, what was considered "authentic" Chinese food (whatever "authentic" means). An Asian co-worker suddenly spoke up and asked about Canadian food, then made a joke about the country not being old enough to have any "traditional Canadian food," or even "Canadian food". We thought for a short while, keeping in mind that Canada was founded primarily by French and English people encroaching on First Nations land. Subsequent to that, we've built up a population comprised of just about every other nation and ethnic group around the world, so the concept of "traditional Canadian food" was a bit of a no-starter.

I suggested that Pemmican was probably the most traditional of Canadian food. Then I had to explain what it was -- to everyone around me, not just the Asian co-worker. Kind of like saying Lacrosse is Canada's national sport. Does anyone even know the rules of Lacrosse?

We sort of came up with a few categories that might help us better define what authentic Canadian cuisine might look/taste like. If we were to start where I started, with the First Nations/Fur Traders genre of food, you might get something like Pemmican, Bannock, etc.

Note that I'm intentionally leaving out indigenous animals, such as bison, salmon, venison, bear, caribou, moose, etc., even though there are apparently some really good recipes out there. My primary reason for this is that just about any of these guys can also be found in the nearby États Unis.

I'm also intentionally leaving out Tim Hortons's coffee, not because it's not traditional or not Canadian. I just don't think Canadians should be known for Tim Hortons's coffee.

I do think we should be known for our Bloody Caesar, invented by Walter Chell at the Owl's Nest Bar in the Westin Hotel in Calgary, Alberta. If anyone has heard of any other Canadian-invented drinks, I'd like to hear about them.

Of course, there's all the east coast foods, such as Codfish Cakes, Solomon Gundy, etc. I'm leaving cod on this list. There are things Newfoundlanders do to cod that are really weird.

Also, the Quebecois food is pretty interesting. Creton, Poutine, Tarte Au Sucre. Pretty much anything there that the France French look down on could be considered.

Desserts too ... Maple Walnut Ice Cream, Nanaimo Bars, Butter Tarts. I can't prove that any of these were actually invented in Canada, of course.

In any case, the list can be as complicated or as unusual as you want to make it. Anyone want to try French Fried Skunk? No?

This is a little gem of a toothpick holder. It's shaped like a voodoo doll, and looks kind of unhappy, given the strategic placement of the little holes. I believe it's from the same company that brought you the Ex Voodoo Knife Holder. Looks like it would be perfect for a Halloween party, or something similar.

Played paintball yesterday for the first time ever. I'm not into guns (real guns -- things that shoot, things that hurt), though I am into first-person shooters, so I figured this was an acceptable compromise. Now I'm sore from jumping into trenches and getting shot, and I've got upwards of 9 welts on different parts of my body. Also, my neck is sunburnt, and I've got a few bug bites. Still, it was kind of fun, and I'd do it again, preferably on a cooler day, with less overhead sun.

One problem I had with the people who ran the paintball course was their choice of names for the different scenarios. It's not very PC to name a scenario "Somalia", or "Colombian Drug Raid", or "Kill the President". And the use of American and Chinese flags was a little unnerving -- all this, coupled with the fact that many of our people were from Middle-East and South Asia made me worry that we'd be rounded-up by the RCMP and shipped off to Syria or Guantanamo.

Otherwise, I really need to improve on my shot/hit ratio.

Occasionally, I'll pull up Google's news website and check the headlines. Since I'm in Canada, it likes to drop me into news.google.ca, and often I'll switch back to news.google.com so I can get the 'Merican stuff.

One of the funny quirks about Google News is that sometimes the images don't sync up with the stories. I came across two of these today, and one's kind of funny, one's disturbing.

I have to admit that showing Dr. Evil when a takeover price reaches one billion dollars is kind of funny. The other one ... well ... I'm even a little concerned it's in the "Sports" section.

It was really pouring out this morning, so I headed to 1842 to grab an espresso and dig into this Carl Hiaasen book I've been reading. Snapped a picture of my car in front of the Zen Gardens sign.

The weekend was pretty fun. We went to the Sultan's Tent for some Moroccan food on Sat. and walked to Ontario Place for the last installment of the Symphony of Fire. I ate at the Sultan's Tent once before, when it was in Yorkville, and they seem to have fixed it up a bit since they moved -- made it seem a little classier, a little more like a dinner theatre. If you're booked for the late bellydancing show, you wait in the Moroccan-styled bar up front until a table becomes available. The tables are laid out in small groups of 4 or 5 per room. When the show starts, they draw the curtains (the "walls" of the room) so that you can get a good view of the dancer. Food was delicious, and there were numerous vegetarian options.

The Symphony of Fire was cool. We were pretty far away from where it was taking place, but the vantage point gave us a good view of the fireworks. We were too far away to really hear the music, but I'm pretty sure I heard Metallica in there just after the 1812 Overture.

Saw the new "Superman Returns" film on the weekend. People have been talking about how it rates as a film, especially a superhero film -- considering that Bryan Singer stopped working on "X3" to do this film ... also considering that they altered the DC mythos and Superman's powers to fit the film a little better. I liked the film, and I liked what they did with Superman, though I had continual issues with Clark Kent's eyebrows.

I'm no DC comics purist, or anything, but I do like to see comic book characters stay somewhat within their initial template. You know -- Superman works good in sunlight, he's allergic to kryptonite, he flies, has X-ray vision, heat vision, and otherwise, he's pretty much impervious to damage. If you explain these powers, or fine tune them, that's all good. For example, he's not immediately disabled by kryptonite, but it will kill him. That's OK. If he recharges his "batteries" in sunlight, that's also fine. But if you start saying he's really from Earth, and got bitten by a radioactive spider, it's not so good. So in that respect, this was still good. Superman pretty much remained in the template we expected.

I used to be a big comic book reader, mostly interested in alternative and small label comics, such as Image, Dark Horse, etc. So I'm more concerned with the way the "TMNT" franchise made the Shredder into an alien in an exoskeleton, or how "The Mask" was dumbed down for children instead of being a darkly humourous (and very bloody) horror film. To me, those were big deviations from the mythology. Making Superman younger or setting it in modern time -- there's nothing wrong with that.

One point of note. It was interesting to see the dilemma that Superman faced after his return to Earth. Imagine meeting up with someone you haven't seen for five years, and to see that they now have a son -- one which looks a lot like you, and which may or may not be your own. How do you even start a conversation with them about it? If life is like the "Superman Returns" film, you don't. Interesting lesson.

Sunday I had to drive down to my parents' place in London. On the way back, I decided to do a detour through Staffa and see if that mysterious dome house was still there. I discovered this house some years back while driving through farm country, and I've been interested in it ever since. It makes for an interesting story.

Normally, you'll miss Staffa if you blink, though a cursory search on the Internet would suggest it's a booming metropolis. Business directories, friend finders, white pages, tourism directories ... the place isn't very big at all.

Actually, it's just an intersection somewhere west of Stratford, with no businesses or shops (not even a post office or a convenience store) as far as I can see. If the population total on the sign is correct, no one lives there.

The dome house itself lies almost hidden behind an overgrown driveway with waist-high grass and evergreen trees. It looks to be in good shape, but is completely deserted. The stone barn/shed near the entrance has crumbled over the past couple of years, but looked to be in good shape the first time I saw it. It might have made a good driving shed, or a workshop/studio. Now it's in ruins.

When the grass was shorter, a few years ago, I stopped nearby and walked up to the house. It was solid, and looked like most of the work had been finished, at least on the outside. The sliding patio doors at the back had been smashed, and piles of broken safety glass were scattered on the steps. I felt a little weird walking around inside the place, but it was interesting to see one of these dome houses in action.

The inside was unfinished -- there were bales of insulation still stacked neatly, and there were stairs leading down into a basement, so my guess was that the foundation was in place, it was solid, and relatively dry. If that crappy "Blair Witch Project" film taught us anything, it was to not go down into basements of deserted houses, so I avoided that unhappy ending, curiosity be damned.

I don't remember if there was a loft built, but I do think there were some wall frames in place. It was quite roomy, and it made me want to build my own dome house. The floor plan was pretty close to Timberline's Birch model. I talked with my dentist in Stratford about it, and he said that his father owned the adjacent farmland. He said that if they could find and purchase the land, they'd let me buy the dome house from them ... as long as I moved it from the site. I wasn't that interested in his proposal, and it didn't seem like they were going to be able to get the land anytime soon.

If anyone has any ideas about this place, let me know.

I was in Toronto on Thursday -- stuck there all day, waiting for access to a new co-lo on Front St. So I got in touch with the Leader, and we hung out at his office, getting to know all the servers that he works with on a regular basis. We also hit Betty's Pub which was nearby. Good place -- lots of veggie options there.

Also at Betty's were these terrific posters for Boddingtons Ale, made by Dan Clowes. I had my camera with me, so I took some pics of them. There was a third poster, but it was in a public spot, and I didn't want to look to conspicuous snapping photos of everything.